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Materials Needed

• Notebook & Pen(cil)
• Heart Shaped Cork Jar
• Wax Seal Kit
• Love Incense
• Rose Quartz Chips
• Dried Rosemary Leaves
• Dried Hibiscus Leaves
• Dried Rose Petals
• Pink Salt
• Sugar

Self Love

First, make sure you read through all of this before you begin. The first part of this ritual starts with some self reflection and self love exercises.

There are parts of finding love in another that are not aligned when we do not love ourselves. When we wish to attract love, we need to build the love we have for ourselves so we can properly love others. This first bit includes a bit of shadow work regarding your self love. Don’t skip this part. In fact, take your time with it. It’s okay if this ritual takes a little bit to complete all of its parts. But do it, dammit!

When you look into a mirror, what looks back at you?

Do you like what you see?

Do you accept all that you are?

For your gifts and imperfections, for all of your good thoughts and bad?

Do you truly love all of yourself?

If you answered no to any of these questions, think about why you answered no. Write the answers down as to why the answers are no. Sit with those answers and think about if these answers are rational in an objective world. If your best friend said these things about herself, would you accept them or counter them with support? Why don’t you deserve the same support from yourself?

Practicing self love is crucial to your existence. So you will make a self love jar that will help you find the path to loving yourself and finding love.

Self Love Jar Instructions

For this ritual, it will call to the goddess Aphrodite to aide you in your journey with love. If Aphrodite isn’t someone you wish to work with, that’s totally okay. You may replace her with your chosen deity.

When you recite the passages below, make sure you say them with force. Say it with purpose, like you mean it. You need to mean it. Say it like you believe it so you can start believing it wholeheartedly.

Between herbal layers make sure to use a stick (like a cut chopstick) to tamp down herbs. You can include more ingredients if you push springy herbs down.

Step one: Take your empty spell jar, take the cork off of it, and cleanse it with smoke from incense and say “Into this smoke, I release all energies in and around this jar that serve no purpose to this ritual or my greatest good.”

Step two: Add the rose quartz chips as the bottom layer of your spell bottle. As you slowly dump the chips say “Blessed Aphrodite, I ask that you help me to accept myself just the way I am, without judgment.  Help me to accept my mind the way it is, with all my emotions, my hopes and dreams, my personality, my unique way of being.  Help me to accept my body just the way it is, with all its beauty and perfect imperfections.  Let the love I have for myself be so strong that I never again reject myself or sabotage my happiness, freedom, and love.”

Step Three: Add the rosemary next. Break up some of the rosemary into smaller bits (use a mortar and pestle if you have one) DO NOT PUT THEM IN WHOLE. Dump some rosemary in the jar then say “From now on, let every action, every reaction, every thought, and every emotion, be based in love.  Help me, Aphrodite, to increase my self-love until my life is transformed, from fear and drama to love and joy.  Let the power of my self-love be strong enough to break all the lies I was programmed to believe–all the lies that tell me I am not good enough, or strong enough, or intelligent enough, that I cannot make it.  Let the power of my self-love be so strong that I no longer need to live my life according to other people’s opinions.  Let me trust myself completely to make the choices I must make.  With my self-love, I am no longer afraid to face any responsibility in my life or face any problems and resolve them as they arise.  Whatever I want to accomplish, let it be done with the power of my self-love.”

Step Four: Add the Pink Salt & Sugar next. As you slowly dump the salt and sugar in, say “Starting today, help me to love myself so much that I never set up any circumstances that go against me.  I can live my life being myself and not pretending to be someone else just to be accepted by other people.  I no longer need other people to accept me or tell me how good I am because I know what I am.  With the power of my self-love, let me enjoy what I see every time I look in the mirror.  Let there be a big smile on my face that enhances my inner and outer beauty.  Help me to feel such intense self-love that I always enjoy my own presence.”

Step Five: Add the hibiscus next. As you push in the hibiscus say “Let me love myself without judgment, because when I judge, I carry blame and guilt, I have the need for punishment, and I lose the perspective of your love.  Strengthen my will to forgive myself at this moment.  Clean my mind of emotional poison and self-judgment so I can live in complete peace and love.”

Step Six: Add the rose petals next. As you slowly push in the rose petals say “Let my self-love be the power that changes the dreams of my life.  With this new power in my heart, the power of self-love, let me transform every relationship I have, beginning with the relationship I have with myself.  Help me to be free of any conflict with others.  Let me be happy to share my time with my loved ones and to forgive them for any injustice I feel in my mind.  Help me to love myself so much that I forgive anyone who, I feel, has ever hurt me in my life. But also help me to love myself enough to cut ties with those who have hurt me. I can forgive, but I will not ignore the patterns. I love myself enough to let go.”

Step Seven: Now you will seal your spell jar. Visualize yourself putting your energy into the bottle. Concentrate on these lessons of self love for a moment and then physically (BUT GENTLY)  blow into the bottle. Gentle amounts of air so as to not make herbs go everywhere. You can place your finger over the hole enough to block herbs from going everywhere. After you’ve done this, cork your bottle.

Step Eight: After you’ve corked your bottle you will get your wax seal stamp and candle ready. It is always good to place a sheet of aluminum foil under your spell jar to catch rogue wax. Light your candle and drip wax onto the top of your bottle. Try to pool wax on the top of the cork and build up until it naturally drips. Once you have a good amount of wax on top place your wax stamp into the wax. The wax will harden around the stamp after 10 or so seconds and then you can pull the stamp off the bottle.  While you’re going through this sealing process recite the following:

“Today is a new beginning. Help me to start my life over beginning today with the power of self-love.  Help me to enjoy my life, to enjoy my relationships, to explore life, to take risks, to be alive and to no longer live in fear.  Let me open my heart to the love that is my birthright.  Help me to become a Master of Gratitude, Generosity, and Love so that I can enjoy all the creations of the divine forever. So mote it be.”